{"id":2723,"date":"2020-10-15T18:52:29","date_gmt":"2020-10-15T18:52:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stillpointcounselingandwellness.com\/?p=2723"},"modified":"2020-10-15T18:52:29","modified_gmt":"2020-10-15T18:52:29","slug":"recovering-your-life-after-surviving-domestic-violence","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stillpointcounselingandwellness.com\/?p=2723","title":{"rendered":"Recovering Your Life After Surviving Domestic Violence"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/blogs.bcm.edu\/2019\/10\/15\/recovering-from-intimate-partner-violence\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Studies show<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> nearly one in four women and one in ten men have been a victim of physical violence, stalking or psychological aggression within an intimate partner relationship at any given time and nearly half of women homicide victims in the U.S are killed by a former or current partner. According to Cynthia Conner, a licensed social worker with Baylor College of Medicine, abuse \u201cimpacts the survivor\u2019s self-esteem, to the point where they can internalize and believe the abuser\u2019s view of themselves. They begin questioning whether they deserve the abuse, which makes it difficult for them to leave the relationship.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For survivor\u2019s who ARE able to leave the abusive situation they\u2019re in, long-term recovery is crucial as nearly <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/blogs.bcm.edu\/2019\/10\/15\/recovering-from-intimate-partner-violence\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">20% of intimate partner violence survivors experience<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u201can onset of psychiatric disorders including depression, anxiety disorder, and PTSD.\u201d Although each situation is different, providing a supportive environment is important for helping anyone who is healing from intimate partner abuse. If someone you know has recently left an abusive partner, here are some tips to help them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Provide them with non-judgemental support. It\u2019s important for survivors to feel not only believed but heard when leaving their abuser or talking about trauma.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Remind them that the abuse they endured was not their fault.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Remind them that you are supportive of their decision.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Avoid using language that makes the survivor feel like they\u2019re being blamed or shamed. Avoid questions like \u201cwhy didn\u2019t you leave sooner?\u201d or \u201cwhy didn\u2019t you stand up for yourself?\u201d<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you yourself are a victim or survivor of domestic violence, here are some tips to help you reclaim your life.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Always remember, the abuse was not your fault. Do not blame yourself and try to avoid \u201cI should have\u201d phrases like \u201cI should have known better\u201d or \u201cI should have left sooner.\u201d<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Find someone to confide in that you can talk to about what you went through whether that be a friend, loved one or parent.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Seek professional help through therapy.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Know that they may try to manipulate you to win you back. Be strong enough to say no and seek legal help if needed.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you\u2019re planning to leave, have a safety plan in place. This might include preparing a to-go bag, having people on call if you need help, having a few places in mind to go when you plan on leaving.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Be gentle and kind with yourself while you heal.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Some resources:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.thehotline.org\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The National Domestic Violence Hotline<\/span><\/a> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">1-800-799-7233 (also available for live chat).<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For caregivers and supporters: Visit the <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/avda-tx.org\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Aid to Victims and Domestic Abuse<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> site\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Wilmington NC, residents: <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.domesticviolence-wilm.org\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Domestic Violence Shelter and Services, Inc.<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For NC residents. <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/ncadmin.nc.gov\/domestic-violence-programs-directory-full-listing\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A full listing of Domestic Violence Programs\u00a0<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For survivors, family and friends. <\/span><a href=\"http:\/\/www.ncdsv.org\/images\/SG_Surviving-DV.pdf\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Check out this packet<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> full of information about abuse, safety planning, reclaiming your life and relationships after abuse, and a ton of more information.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Studies show nearly one in four women and one in ten men have been a victim of physical violence, stalking or psychological aggression within an intimate partner relationship at any given time and nearly half of women homicide victims in the U.S are killed by a former or current partner. According to Cynthia Conner, a [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":2724,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,8,9],"tags":[75,78,79],"class_list":["post-2723","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-relationships","category-self-care","category-trauma-resilience","tag-dmva","tag-domestic-violence-awareness","tag-domestic-violence-awareness-month"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stillpointcounselingandwellness.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2723","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stillpointcounselingandwellness.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stillpointcounselingandwellness.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stillpointcounselingandwellness.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stillpointcounselingandwellness.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2723"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/stillpointcounselingandwellness.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2723\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stillpointcounselingandwellness.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2724"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stillpointcounselingandwellness.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2723"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stillpointcounselingandwellness.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2723"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stillpointcounselingandwellness.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2723"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}